Lately, I have thinking about my occupation. I call myself a "Professional Stay at Home Mom". I chose this job, and I take it very seriously. I have done many other things (USAF pilot, Sales Account Exec, and High School Teacher) and this has been the hardest for me, but I embrace it.
I was recently sewing for an upcoming craft show, and my baby (age 2) who is always quite delightful was being...mmmm, not so delightful. After some reflection, I realized that my priority had shifted. I was now short with her in order to "get things done". Our days consisted of a grumpy mommy trying to get the house in show order for potential buyers (we are moving), while doing "work" and she was not feeling it. I am not an advocate of over doting and spoiling my child, don't get me wrong, but more so, she could sense my flusteredness. (Is that a word??) I was not "in the moment" and I was not at peace. I can picture my wrinkle in the middle of my forehead getting deeper and deeper.
Firstly, I realized how hard it is for a parent who works from home. I am sure they feel constantly torn between their job and the child. I have to give it to them! (Also, I totally misjudged the whole take-care-of-kids thing when in my 20s...) For me, since I don't have to work, I decided that I don't want my child to feel like I don't want to be here. I don't want her feeling my frustration, with being pulled in two directions. I want to embrace my experience and the NOW.
I am a big fan of working side by side, but in a peaceful manner. She will happily create with her crafts next to me for an hour, while I sew and we listen to music. I love looking online for fun activities that we can do together (and avoid the TV). And my favorite? I love to bake with her. And, yes, she can play on her own for a bit, but the balance of it all was off. I was doing way more of the stuff that I thought needed to be done, and putting such pressure on myself, and forgot to slow down and enjoy the journey.
This isn't a parenting post, really. This is more a post about me and about embracing the now and living more peacefully with what you are given. In that regard, a friend of mine really changed my mind about another part of my job. She said to "Beautify corners" instead of cleaning. For some reason, just the change in how I see it has made cleaning wayyy more enjoyable and, crazy enough, has made me do more of it!
Take a deep breath, folks. What isn't working for you? (I sound like Dr. Phil.) Nothing is stopping you from changing that, if even just a little :)